There's no such thing as perfect people...

There's no such thing as perfect people

There's no such thing as a perfect life

So come as you are, broken and scarred

Lift up your heart and be amazed

And be changed

by a perfect God...

There is never a dull moment in my life, I tell ya. 2010 has thus far been so far from how I imagined it would be, and now I sit here at a crossroads with such opportunity ahead that I would be crazy not to let God take the control he is constantly begging me for...

Today my mother and I spent a good hour and a half if not two together in the car on our way to Greensboro to pick up tiffany. We had some much needed conversation about so many important topics from the state of the world these days, to our relationships and the impact every relationship in life has, to what God has been telling us lately. I am so very VERY blessed and thankful for the family I have and the bond and closeness we have all developed. We are a family that has the ability to laugh, cry and hold eachother up in every situation we have encountered. I may be absent from the household much of the time due to my crazy life but the moments I am lucky enough to spend with them are some that I am so very thankful for. In this day and age it is so rare to find a family like ours and I am blessed to be a part of something that is so strong and wholesome in a world that is often quite the opposite.

I have had a pulling feeling on my heart lately that has left me with a gut feeling I have not been able to put my finger on. God has been speaking to me loud and clear and in the midst of life I have admittedly not taken the time to sit back and listen to Him. The lyrics above are from a song called "Perfect people" by natalie grant and it was while listening to that recently that a lot clicked and got me thinking. Many of us strive for perfection in our daily lives, and insecurities cause us to seek recognition for our actions. I am absolutly guilty of trying too hard to get others to notice me and my accomplishments. When it comes down to it though, none of that matters. As important as it is to act with integrity and treat everyone with the respect and dignity that they deserve, it doesn't matter to God that I stayed an extra twenty minutes to finish a project at work, or that I held the door open for a stranger. What matters is the heart, mindset, and relationship that I have with Him. I have let that relationship sit on the backburner slightly as I barely have time to think let alone spend time with God. And yet, that is my own doing. My priorities have been skewed and because of that I hear Him calling out to me to reprioritize in so many ways. Whether it be a random stranger making a comment about my faith, or a worship song coming on the radio at the most perfect time...

It is clear that I am at a point where some changes need to be made.

I miss writing...both on here and in my journal. I miss writing long letters to my friends back in California. I miss those quiet moments to myself of my back porch as the sun is going down. I miss being carefree and giddy...being an adult is a lot harder than you think it is growing up. Bills, bills and more bills have piled up lately raising my stress level, and yet as I sat writing my budget for the next few months I had an odd peace about my life. As if God literally was sitting in my room saying do your best and put more trust in me.

So with all that vague information, I am going to say this; I plan on making some significant changes within myself, my priorities and my attitude within the next 6months. I think that this point in time is a very cruicial one in our world and there isn't a better time to step back from the world and immerse oneself in strengthening those relationships that are most important.

I am going to document my journey as I go, and would appreciate prayers for strength and focus throughout this. I have a lot on my plate and am looking forward to simplifying as well as discovering the woman that God is calling me to be.

A thousand times I’ve failed

Still your mercy remains

Should I stumble again

Still I’m caught in your grace

Everlasting

Your light will shine when all else fades

Never ending

Your glory goes beyond all fame

Your will above all else

My purpose remains

The art of losing myself

In bringing you praise

In my heart, in my soul

I give you control

Consume me from the inside out

Let justice and praise

Become my embrace

To love you from the inside out

Everlasting

Your light will shine when all else fades

Never ending

Your glory goes beyond all fame

And the cry of my heart

Is to bring you praise

From the inside out of my soul

Lord my soul cries out....

Determination.

What a crazy past month. I don't know where to begin the update on my life...things are crazy and amazing. Guess I will just try and do my best here, its been awhile again, I barely have time to sleep these days let alone get online for any length of time...
So, Last I wrote I was interviewing for an assistant store manager position at my store...The interview went wonderfully and the hurry up and wait was the worst part. I recieved a call 4 days after the interview that the promotion is MINE! What an exciting way to come back to work-with the motivation and challenge of a new position and more responsibilities. It is more hours and more work, but also a good bit more income too...I really couldn't be happier. So work is great, no complaints just excited to learn and grow.
The social life is goin well...I am dating a wonderful man who treats me so well. I am loving getting to know him and the time we spend together. Our latest mission is to start getting healthy together, eat better and work out which I am excited about. With Doug has come a fun new group of friends, so we are enjoying the summertime with good people. Goin out on the lake, get togethers at my house, his house, friends houses...too fun! We have a 7wk old dwarf bunny named Shelley that we keep at his house most of the time and I swear she is a dog at heart. She responds to her name and loves to snuggle and give kisses, as well as run laps around the room and socialize with anybody and everybody...best $6 I've ever spent! (yep, six bucks...swapmeet bunny! oh the things people sell in the south....teehee)
I owe all my California peeps an apology for being such a bad friend lately.. (I tagged you on facebook in this for a reason!, thinkin about you!) Life has been insane like I said and I wish I had time to sit and chat with y'all for an hour each, or better yet come visit me and let me show you a great time out here! I hope you know you are always welcome to visit and I promise to make it a great time for ya! :)
Lets see what else is new with me...new tattoo on my foot, check out facebook for a picture of that. Its an ambigram...a word that reads "faith" one way and "trust" the other. I love it! Also doing another portfolio photoshoot for my makeup art on the 26th of this month...going to be a ton of fun! Doing makeup and hair, Jo Ellen is taking pictures and I'm going to have my designer purse lady over to sell her purses and jewelry and clothes and stuff...yay! As well as wine and cheese and other tasty treats, come on over ladies!!
The ankle is healing nicely, had a setback for a little bit and the doctor thought it wasn't healing right and that more surgery was a possibility, but swelling has gone down significantly as i get back in the routine of things which is a huuge blessing. God is so good, I love my life!

OH I am still selling AVON so check out the site if you want! Again you can place orders thru me or on my website.

Hope all of you are doing well, love you all!
xoxo

www.avonrepresentative.com/bgreen5062

Back to crazy busy life...

So this weekend is about my last one for a long time (if ever) where I don't have any work and nothing to stress me out...Time has definitely flown by but I think these past few months have been a huge learning experience and I am so thankful for it.
The ankle is healing up well, I am back on my feet literally! It is still sore as it will be for some time but it is a world off difference and improvement than before. I go back to work on wednesday, and have a HUGE opportunity that I need prayers for on Thursday...my store has earned an assistant manager and I am interviewing for the job! I feel as if this is so perfect right now as I NEED the money and the hours, and also I feel like I am so very qualified for this position as I have been with the company for going on 7 years, in addition to my calm demeanor and knowledge...I think it would be a perfect fit!! Fingers and toes crossed!!!
Another HUGE prayer request...my Poppy has been downtown in the hospital for I believe a week now...went in with chest pains and they have now tested him for everything from heart problems, to kidney problems, to cancer...they still have no idea what is wrong with him, and I just know he is going stir crazy in there. And my poor Grammy has to drive downtown constantly to visit him. I know this is tough on my mom as well because she is torn between being a nurse and being a concerned daughter, so the line is hard to distinguish as far as what she can say or do without getting anyone in trouble. Definitely need prayers for the family.
Another one bites the dust....Brooke graduated 8th grade on thursday! She is now in HIGH SCHOOL! Dang do I feel old. Its so weird how they have all grown up SO very fast...i am now officially the shortest Green girl I believe! We have had a lot of fun as a family these past couple months, from lake days to seeing Wicked (AMAZING!) and enjoying eachothers company, I just don't want anything to change! Time flies way too fast, enjoy it while you can y'all!
I have a new and wonderful man in my life...his name is Doug and he makes me very happy. We have enjoyed a few days out on the lake with friends, are having fun watching the NBA finals (Lakers totally have this!), and honestly the best time I have with him is when we are just lying on the driveway at night looking at stars and talking about life. Its nice when you meet someone you click with and can talk to about anything. I am not rushing into anything but really enjoying spending time with him.
Well I need to get some AVON stuff processed....please check out the website and if you find something you like order through me or the site! Thanks to those of you who have already ordered, I really appreciate it! Keep checking back for new products!!
www.avonrepresentative.com/bgreen5062

Have a great day y'all..will keep you posted about everything!!
xoxo

Check it outttt :)

Soo as you probably are all aware, recently I had bone and tendon surgery in my foot, and due to that have been unable to work for over two whole months. Because I have not been working and am trying to pay off multiple and very expensive medical bills, I decided to start working from home....
I have chosen to work as an Avon Rep because I truly stand by the causes they support, as well as their products. As both an NC and CA licensed Esthetician, there are many products Avon has to offer that I like and would recommend (Skin So Soft and mark. products are my personal favorites!). As well as great beauty products, there are fun and affordable things for men, women and children- from gifts, house wares, clothing, to even grill accessories and jewelry. I encourage you to check out a catalog as well as my website. (I can get you a catalog, just ask :) )It doesn't matter if you live nearby in Charlotte, In Michigan, Oklahoma, California or even Hawaii...When you see something you like, you can order online or give me a call or an email with the catalog campaign number and product information. It is really easy to do, quick for me to order, and it will be delivered to your doorstep! Ordering through me will be a big help in fundraising for my medical bills. In addition to that, I am very passionate about the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation because of my sweet cousin who lives with this disease,and will be donating money from my Avon sales on a monthly basis to go towards finding a cure. Not to mention Avon itself supports many charities and NPOs such as Finding a Cure for Breast Cancer, BreadforLife, and m.powerment against abuse!

Thank you guys for taking the time to read this! Please browse through a catalog or my website at your convenience and feel free to give me a call, text or email with any orders or even just questions.

B_green927@yahoo.com

www.avonrepresentative.com/bgreen5062

I called, you answered, and you came to my rescue...

AHH GOD IS SO GOOD! In the midst of all the stress and chaos in my household and running through my head, there's God, just chillin, waiting for me to just LET GO and say "hey, do your thing big man!"
You all know how this surgery business has put a damper on my mood and bank account, and just as I had exhausted all of my options, a job opportunity has presented itself. One that I think would be perfect fit for me at this point in time, and would be financially the biggest blessing ever. For now I need to keep details quiet, but will keep you up to date as I know anything. I need prayers in a major way that I get this job. It would not only help me out, but would be an opportunity to help my family out too. To give back to them for all they have given me. :)
I have a peace like I haven't felt in awhile, and regardless of what happens I am so very determined to keep that feeling. With peace often comes patience which I need to work on, and I'm feeling like there are really good things up ahead for me if I just let life happen and God take the control.
I would just like to switch focus now onto one of the people in my life who have been the biggest blessings. I wrote a super long blog about my family and there are a handful of people who I consider my best friends that deserve some recognition, for now I am just going to pick one and elaborate. I will get to all of you, I promise. :)
Lindsi Morgen, my best friend. This girl has hands down had the most impact on my life of all of my friends. She is inspiring, talented, driven, very educated, eloquent, deep, silly, loving and a little ball of happiness to all who know her...Truly beautiful inside and out. I spent an entire month sleeping in the same bed with this girl as we traveled Europe and never got sick of waking up to that goofball. We can be in a foreign country, a beach in california, my screened porch in north carolina,or just sitting in a room and talk about nothing, anything, and everything from the most ridiculous and silly things to life and family and religon. We are so different and yet have a friendship like none other I have experienced. She has brought so much joy to my life, and I am super excited to say she is moving out to North Carolina hopefully in the fall. She walked in her graduation ceremony this weekend, and with a bachelors in psychology her life is just getting started. I can't wait to see what life has in store for this one.

I will most definitely continue to write about my best friends in blog posts to come. I need to get to building up my resume a bit...
Psalm 118:24, this is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it!
Happy monday y'all! Enjoy it!
xoxo

Oh hi 4:15am! So nice to see you again...

Errr...not! Haha. Maybe I wake up at this time because I sleep randomly during the day when I have nothing else to do? Thats about my best guess.

Things at the Green household have been hectic lately, and I think the gravity of the situations going on around me have just started to soak in. As I sat in my front room yesterday with my girlfriends decorating signs and such for my graduating sisters it started to sink in...My little sisters aren't little anymore. And I am a grown up. That hits me at the most random of times, when I really take a second to stop and think about things going on around me. My friend Justina and her hubby just found out they are having a boy, many of my high school friends have babies, are married or engaged to be married, graduating their universities this month, and starting their lives. I'll admit, I have done my life somewhat unconventionally, and sometimes to the disapproval of my family, but where I am at, I couldnt be happier. God's got a plan.

I chose not to go to a 4 yr university for a handful of reasons, mainly I wanted to make money and not spend it. In doing so I was able to gain life experience, wisdom and accomplish so much more than lots of my friends stuck in a classroom. (Not to at all discredit the hard work you amazing people have done!) Let me elaborate. Getting a job as a newly 16 year old and maintaining it for going on 7 years is more than majority of people my age can say. A job with benefits that years down the line has paid for doctors visits, contacts, and now a good portion of major surgery...not to mention more coffee, tea and pastries for my fam and me than most people consume in a lifetime...hmm no wonder I lost all this weight the past month! *giggle*

In addition to that, how many people can say they have travelled the world on their own and on their own dime by the age of 21? I have seen, heard, touched, smelled, felt, walked, tasted, ridden, laughed, cried, danced and sang in the most amazing of places. I have made friends from Germany, Australia, London, Canada, so many states and many more places across the globe. The experiences and emotions felt cannot be put into words no matter how hard I may try, but the fact that I got to do all that with no one but my best friend was absolutely phenomenal. We now share an unspeakable bond that will undoubtedly tie us together for the rest of our lives.

That being said, I digress...my sisters are all grown up! Tiff moves out to UNCG in a couple months, and watching her turn from my lil baby sis to a full on woman within a matter of weeks it seems is enough to bring me to tears. I could not be prouder of the woman that she has become. This girl has made a consious note of my mistakes, learned from them, and in addition to that has just soared beyond the high expectations she has set for herself. Honor roll, prom queen, model/actress, pretty much every guys dream girl (stay away or I will be forced to hurt you :-P), and on top of that she has integrity, faith and a relationship with God that I as her older sister look up to. She is honestly my closest friend and I love the relationship and bond we share...not exactly sure how I am going to handle her not being here, but cannot express how excited I am for whatever her future may hold.

Natalie has blossomed overnight as well...not only is she physically just stunning, but this girl has incredible smarts beyond anyone else her age. Let me just preface her story with the fact that between my parents and I, we are mathematically challenged. And when I say that I mean we are terrible at it and highly dislike it. Hate may even be an appropriate word in my case. Now, Nat went to NC STATE math championships. Like, WOW right?! Studying things they wouldn't dare speak of around me back then haha. Not only that, but she is on honor roll, played volleyball and soccer this year as a freshman, again has a relationship with God to be admired, and has developed some of the most incredible art skills and sense of style. This girl can pick up a sketchbook and freehand a set of stairs, a plant, or a scene and make it look just inspired. She is starting to notice boys which to be blunt scares the crap outta me, because she is like a younger version of me in a sense, and I know how oblivious and naive I was/still am when it comes to relationships...heartbreak is one of those things everyone experiences, and although I have a feeling she will be more the heartbreaker, I still never want to see her get hurt like that. Thank goodness we have the type of relationship where we can talk and share experiences, and again, boys watch out, I will be your worst enemy if you hurt my girls!

Then there is Brookie. The age difference between us has always prevented us from having much in common, and unfortunately we weren't as close as I would've liked until recently. But this girl has amazed me with her constant cheery and peppy attitude, her compassion and affection for everyone and everything from small animals, to babies, to her peers, elders...you name it, this girl is just the epitome of a sweetheart. She is the kind of girl that will give you her jacket if its snowing, stick up for a friend being made fun of, and tell the boys off for being perverted...you go girl! She has always enjoyed dancing around the house and making up cheers, and just as of the past 2 yrs started dancing and cheering. JUST 2 YEARS...and she just made the VARSITY cheer team for next year as a freshman in high school!!!!! I am so exstatic for her. The light and positivity this teenager brings to this world is incredible. Academically she is a lot how I was, not super focused, but just yearning to be let out and have life experience. She works with the kiddos at church, quotes bible verses daily, and Between her talents and incredible attitude, I know she is going to do such great things.

Lots of people during my lifetime have asked me why I am the way I am, why my sisters are the way they are, and how come all of us have turned out to be so mature and compassionate for our young ages...being "grown up" and able to see a tiny bit more of the bigger picture, I will once again say what I have said so many times before...my parents. My parents have created an enviornment in which we are encouraged to set the bar higher. Be the exception, and don't let anything seem unnattainable. God has been present daily in our family life, during prayer at meals, church and church groups during the week, and clearly in my parents marraige and parenting. When most parents would give in to be their childs friend, my parents stood together and PARENTED. Now years later, the friendship and respect I have for them for all that they have put up with and overcome is astonishing. Although we argue as all families do, the bond the 6 of us have is completely unbreakable. No matter where we move to, travel to, or any mistakes any of us could make, we've got love like no other that will tie us together regardess.

Well, hows that for deep, 0'dark thirty!? Y'all see why I need to get back to workin? :)

In conclusion to this essay I have written about my fabulous family, I would like to wrap it up with the lyrics to a song called "Fingerprints of God" that has touched my heart and I hope that my sisters read this and get something from it as well. I love you guys!!!

and a happy thursday to anyone else who has read my ramblings thus far! xoxo!

I can see the tears filling Your eyes And I know where they're coming from

They're coming from a heart that's broken in two

By what you don't see

The person in the mirror

Doesn't look like the magazine

Oh, but when I look at you it's clear to me that...
I can see the fingerprints of God When I look at you

I can see the fingerprints of God And I know it's true

You're a masterpiece That all creation quietly applauds

And you're covered with the fingerprints of God

Never has there been and never again Will there be another you

Fashioned by God's hand And perfectly planned

To be just who you are

And what He's been creating Since the first beat of your heart

Is a living breathing priceless work of art and...

I can see the fingerprints of God When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God And I know it's true
You're a masterpiece That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God

Just look at you You're a wonder in the making

Oh, and God's not through, no In fact,

He's just getting started.....

Been awhile...

It is 620am. I have been up tossing and turning since about 430...figured I'd migrate from my bed onto the screened porch to listen to the birds and enjoy the quiet before everyone starts their day. I was a little frustrated at first but hey, I've got another month+ to sleep, why not take advantage of a crisp quiet early morning? :)
I am on week 6 of recovery and SO ready to be back to "normal" life. I've always known patience isn't exactly a strength of mine but dang! I am counting down the days til I am off crutches, then out of the boot, then back to work...surely I will look back at this and kick myself when I am back working full time but oh well.
The first two weeks were really tough, the pain I experienced was unlike anything I have ever dealt with before. I had completely torn my peroneal tendon in my right ankle over time because of a bone that was too long...so I had tendon repair and reconstructive bone surgery, leaving me with about a 6 inch scar on my foot/ankle and a 2 inch scar on the top of my foot. After those first two weeks though of staying in bed every minute of every day, I got a boot put on and got the ok to get out a little more on my crutches. Blake kindly came and kidnapped me so I could get a change of scenery, and I spent some time with him at the beach and he was great about keeping my spirits up. Got to spend a little time with his family and I enjoyed lying on the balcony with my foot up soaking up the sun while he was working, we'd cook dinner and watch movies and I had a great time.
Now being back I am trying to keep myself occupied...had a great Mothers day out on lake norman with my grammy and poppy and my fam, hung out and caught up with my friend Kyla the other day, and went out last night for a bit to Fox and Hound. I think some girls from work and I are going to paint pottery later this week which should be fun! Other than trying to stay positive and have little things to look forward to, I have started taking time for me which is good. In the midst of life it is easy to lose yourself to a job or friends, and so I have been spending time journaling and working out, eating healthy (lost 10 lbs in a week, yay!)...I need to spend more time with my Tiffy as she is moving out in a couple months to go to school. So weird how fast everyone grows up and how time flies the older you get...Lindsi is planning on moving out here in the fall which I am SO looking forward to, I know that'll be here before I know it!!
Well the sun is about up and the girls are getting ready for school, wish I could fall back to sleep but instead will probably work out a bit and cuddle up with the puppy and watch a movie. I hope all of you have a fabulous day/week, xoxo!

A Time for Everything

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
(ecclesiastes 3:1-8)


Here I am again, sitting in my favorite spot in the world..my screened in porch...on a gorgeous rainy spring day. I have my puppy at my side, a glass of red wine in hand, and nothing but the sounds of the birds in the trees to distract as I sit here. This verse has really been on my heart lately as my life is changing daily and I am reminded to put my own selfish plans aside and just go with the flow, enjoy what I have been given and just listen and wait for God to reveal his plans for me.
I had a wonderful few days back home with family and both new and old friends, it was awesome to get away for a bit and just let loose. I ate way too much frozen yogurt, went out on the town with the girls, kicked back at an apartment with good people, spent time relaxing with my wonderful family...not one complaint at all, it was a perfect trip!
I am very ready for these next few months to fly by...10 weeks of recovery then SUMMER! sounds as if some of my good friends will come visit which I am very excited for, cant wait to introduce my friends from both sides of the US to eachother and take them all out to experience charlotte, lake norman, my cooking... ;) Eeek sooo excited!! I really do have the best friends in the world, THANK YOU all so much for being there for me thru thick and thin, it means the world!!
Again, this is a less than eloquently written blog...I think I am a little rusty lately as I have been slackin with this bloggin thing. Sorry sorry! Hope all is well with you, blogworld...enjoy this weekend wherever you may spend it!!
xoxo

Dear 2010...

...You kinda suck so far.

Been a really difficult past few weeks...I have the health problems of an elderly woman, some backstabbing "friends", not enough money to pay my bills and not enough hours in the day to work enough to make more money. *sigh*.
However! With the bad there is good and light at the end of the tunnel (or so I'd like to think). I mean, it could always be worse, and I do have a great group of friends and family that are such a supportive blessing to me. And maybe this upcoming 10 weeks of being bedridden are Gods way of telling me to slow down and re-evaluate. Whatever the case may be, I am trying my hardest to put a smile on and push thru with a positive attitude. Although I don't like surgery and I am pretty nervous about it truth be told...
On a very different and happy note, I am going home in 6 days!!!!!!! I cannot wait to see everyone!!!! And eat fro-yo and lollicup and in n out!!!! Oh man. Beach, bests, burgers. Does it even get better than that!?!? I really don't think so! Having a get together at the Yard House which I am pretty excited about, Lindsi got the weekend off so I get to spend a good amount of time with her, got a truck to use which is a huuugeee blessing, and fingers crossed for some good beach weather! Pretty excited to say the least!
Random tidbit...my awesome sister has now gotten accepted to all of the schools she applied for and has to face the lifechanging choice of which one to go to! Prayers for her sanity would be fabulous as she is a little..ok a lot, overwhelmed. Shes such a good kid though so I know she will do great wherever she chooses to go.
Hope you all are doing well...

PS, KALEB GETS TO GO HOME TOdAY! Happy for you guys, Kristi!!!!! LOVE YOU!